Posts Tagged ‘stop my divorce’

Ask Your Mate To Go To A Marriage Counselor

Relationship counseling is often a last resort for couples on the brink of the divorce.But some couples try relationship counseling early, when the first problems arise. Relationship Counseling is something that a couple shouldn’t be afraid to try, even if the problems seem minor.Catching small problems early with counseling can prevent even bigger problems in the future.  Early counseling can even do something to prevent a future divorce.

Todays couples are more apt to try to new things, which makes relationship counseling a good option.Couples married years ago are less likely to go for counseling, perhaps because it wasn’t something you talked about when they were younger. Very often marriages of 20 or 30 years now end in divorce, which is a shame because they’ll never know if relationship counseling could have helped save the marriage.

If you feel like you need relationship counseling, be sure to ask your partner to go to counseling with you in a non-judgmental way.If you ask your partner to go to counseling in a way that seems like you are accusing them of being the problem and needing counseling, you’re likely to encounter resistance to the idea.  Try to make it clear that you want the counseling for yourself if nothing else.

If you ask your partner to go to counseling because you have some issues you need to work on, they’re more likely to view the idea favorably.Explain that you think you need some help to be able to contribute more to the relationship, and to learn how to be a better partner.  Don’t accuse the other person of need counseling.Even if you believe that they are the problem, don’t say it to them.Once you’re both in relationship counseling, you will learn tips and techniques for being better within the relationship, just as your partner will.

Don’t be afraid to suggest marriage counseling, whether you’ve been in the relationship for 6 months, 5 years or 3 decades.  It’s never too late to try counseling to resolve problems.  And it’s never too late to try to keep small problems from becoming big ones. If the relationship is relatively new, you might think that you’re admitting to problems and admitting that the relationship is rocky by suggesting counseling.But that’s not the truth.But by facing any obstacles now, you’re making your relationship stronger in the long run.

If your partner believes that your suggestion of relationship counseling means that the relationship isn’t perfect, and maybe even is doomed, calmly explain that that isn’t true.And because you’re willing to admit that everything is perfect shows that you’re willing to make necessary changes to keep you and your partner happy.

If your partner refuses, go on your own.  While the counseling would work best if both of you go, you can go and work on things to improve yourself. If your partner sees you going to relationship counseling, they’re more likely to give it a try.

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Filed under Divorce : Comments (0) : May 6th, 2009

Helpful Tips To Stop Your Divorce

If you are going through that terrible time when love is coming to an end and you find yourself saying, “Please stop my divorce“! you aren’t alone. There are many who have gone through it and saved their marriage and plenty who didn’t but found themselves happy again afterward. There are things that you can do to help stop a divorce or correct problems before they get to that point.

First realize, though, that as much as you may want to save your relationship you may not be able to. Make sure that you prepare yourself mentally for any possible outcome. This isn’t thinking pessimistically, it is being realistic which is what you need to be.

Seek out marriage counselors or make use of family therapy. They have been well trained and have lots of experience helping people go through these times. Even if someone has cheated on their spouse, they can still help. Many marriages have been saved because of counseling and therapy. They are accustomed to dealing with infidelity between spouses, depression, or any other things that stress a relationship to the point of divorce. Marriage counseling doesn’t have to be expensive, there are plenty of good choices for you to use to get good relationship advice before you see a divorce lawyer.

One thing that you should learn not to do that will help stop your divorce is don’t argue. Fighting will only make things worse. You can call it reasoning or whatever but the truth is you are trying to force them to feel differently than they do. If you are serious and you want to “stop your divorce” then realize that your battle is against your separation, not your spouse. The more you argue with them and try to point out where they are wrong the more they will be wrong in your mind.

Don’t try to defend yourself. You may be right, but don’t try to convince them of that. Find the truth in their argument and agree with that part of it. The more you can agree with the things they say, the more they will be right. This will make them see what you want them to do, see your side of the story. If you are honest and accept what they say then they will more likely be open to listening to your side of the story. Family therapy is great to help you understand how to communicate better if you really want to “stop your divorce”.”

This is only one part of the things that you can do to help when you are wanting someone to help you “stop my divorce“. Stop talking about it and start doing something about it. Your marriage will only have a chance to survive if you are willing to act.

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Filed under Divorce : Comments (0) : Apr 21st, 2009