Posts Tagged ‘save marriage’

How to Improve Communication in a Marriage

Lack of communication is listed as one of the main causes for an unhappy marriage and even divorce. That’s really not unexpected. When you were a baby and weren’t able to communicate, what did you do? You cried and threw a tantrum until somebody figured out what your needs were. Now that you’re grown up that won’t work although it’s tried in some form by many spouses.

Good communication takes practice. Remember, you’re communicating even though you may not be talking.Your body language and expressions can speak a lot about what you like and dislike. Your facial emotions say a lot about you. Do you still smile at your spouse?
Some spouses are afraid to smile or be too nice for fear of being asked to do something they don’t want to do.

If that’s your attitude, maybe it’s time to talk. If you’re not happy with your relationship be honest about it and demand a solution. Solutions usually start at the bargaining table where both parties are willing to negotiate and come up with a solution both can live with.

Find a good and convenient time to communicate. If either of you has a pressing project that needs to be completed or an upcoming schedule, then agree to a more appropriate time. At least you’ve made the effort and the cards are on the table. Don’t trap your spouse in a situation where they must listen such as driving to visit the relatives. You may not be in a good mood when you arrive if this happens.

Be tactful in suggesting a talk is necessary. Don’t be demanding but suggest you’d like to visit a while about such and such as soon as they have time. This gives both of you time to summarize your thoughts. It’s not good to come to the table unready. Know what you’re unhappy with and how you’d suggest the problem be solved.

Once you’re talking, be a good listener. Listening is as important as talking. If your spouse is not as good at expressing as you then compensate.  Repeat what they’ve said by commenting something like “Here’s what I think you’re trying to say.” Don’t talk down to your spouse and make them feel inadequate.Both opinions are equally significant.

Don’t have distractions when talking like the radio or TV and certainly not when the kids are present. Bringing up a problem during dinner is not appropriate.  That would qualify as trapping your partner and problem ruin both your appetites. Your attention must be undivided and you must make eye contact. Allow enough time for a complete discussion.

Strive for a solution but if one is not reached, reschedule a time to continue.Do not give up. Remember there’s another world besides yours and you must exist in both.
Compromise is always a good choice. If you’re wrong, take responsibility and change. If no solution is evident, professional help may be needed.Communication will not solve all your difficulties but it’s a good startup.

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Filed under Communication : Comments (0) : May 21st, 2009

Friendship Is The Core Of Any Good Relationship Or Marriage

A good friendship is very precious.  A good marriage is something to cherish.Is it possible to associate the two and have the best of both worlds?Sometimes friendship comes before marriage but not always. 

You’ve probably had many friends of the opposite sex you would not consider marrying. And, you may have heard someone who’s married comment that the spouse is also a best friend. Did the friendship develop before, during or after the marriage? If your true friend has became your partner now then you are really fortunate.

A friend is someone you can be totally honest and comfortable with. You can spend hours together in talking and sharing your dreams and ideas. They can unintentionally hurt you or cause you discomfort and you have no trouble forgiving them. A good friend is there for you no matter what happens and you care for them regardless.

Friends usually have common interests. You find interesting things to do together and show enthusiasm and encouragement for the other’s victories. If they fail and experience defeat, you are there to help and support. You have mutual respect for each other even if one does something embarrassing. 

The more time you invest in a relationship the more stable and meaningful it becomes. Relationships gain strength when built on a steady incline. By pacing your relationship you gain insight into the character of your friend. You monitor how they react to good and bad events. 

As long as you remain friends, you can be comfortable with what the friend does even if it involves someone else. You’re not jealous of a friend but if you become romantically involved this will change and so will your demeanor. 

You’ll presumably become more demanding and obsessive. Sharing your friend with someone else is not something you’ll permit anymore. The playing field has changed and you hope your friend agrees with the modification in the rules.

No doubt friendships can build a firm foundation for marriage. However, friends often never advance into marriage because the emotional charge is absent. If there is no physical spark then there’s no desire to move further. Marriage has lost many a good friend and friends have lost many a good partner.

Physical attraction is not the only ingredient for a successful marriage relationship. No one can survive and be intimate 24 hours a day. You must explore ways to have more in marriage than sex. Developing a good friendship after marriage has often averted break ups. It’s sometimes easier for lovers to become friends than the other way around.

Friendship and marriage are both things to be desired and acquired. Be thankful if you can experience both in the same relationship. Work together to base your marriage on both and create ways to keep them fresh and alive. A foundation with both is unshakable.

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Filed under Marriage : Comments (0) : May 21st, 2009

How to Save A Relationship – Discover These 3 Counterintuitive Techniques to Save My Relationship

Go to Save My Relationship to read more about get my ex boyfriend back.

When I tried to get my ex wife back and save my relationship I soon realized that it was a very difficult thing to do. There is always the worry that you’ll make one wrong move and lose the person you love forever. If you have been in that situation too, then you probably know what I’m talking about…

Unfortunately, what feels like the right thing to do, is often wrong. Most times we should follow the ‘counterintuitive path’. So when you want to call your ex is when you should stay cool instead. And when you feel like pouring your heart out is when you should put a lid on it.

I must warn you though, as these counterintuitive techniques you’re about to discover you most likely have never seen or heard of before and at first may look and feel wrong, but have been proven to be effective over and over again in even what seemed the most complicated situations. Like when I tried to save my relationship…

Counterintuitive Technique #1
So the first technique you need to use is to agree with and accept the fact that your ex has broken up with you. For some of you this can be very difficult to do and the chances are that you will have a bit of an internal battle before you’re able to agree with and accept the fact that your ex has broken up with you. It can definitely help to understand why you need to accept the breakup, and how it can help you get back together. The main reason is because you need to give your ex time to respect and miss you again. The chances are that they are mad or upset with you at the moment, especially if you’ve beem nagging them about getting back together.

Counterintuitive Technique #2
The second technique you need to use is to cut off all communication. You’re probably about ready to close your browser right now! Hold on, because this technique really does work. Here’s why. Because it helps you to accept the breakup and it’s also the action that shows your ex you are serious. Therefor, by not communicating you are giving your ex time to miss you and time to get over the reasons for breaking up. This moment of space will be good for your mental health as well, and will help you to think clearly. It also sets you up for the next technique.

Counterintuitive Technique #3
The final step you must take is to plan an event where the two of you can reconnect. But there are many critical steps in between you can not leave out! Discover all the counterintuitive and unconventional steps to get your ex back and save your relationship here…

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Filed under General : Comments (0) : Jan 4th, 2009

How To Make Your Marriage Work Like A Charm – 8 Tips To Help Your Marrriage

Can you really stay happily ever after in a marriage?

To keep a marriage good you have to work on it. Both of you have to be ready to keep working on the relationship. There will be a lot of tender loving care needed, if you want to keep your relationship fresh and exciting. The chances that your relationship will be able to survive are a lot higher if both of you are ready to give and receive.

8 Tips on how to make your marriage work:

1. Whether you are just married or have been together for many years, in order to build a strong relationship you must learn how to communicate effectively. Always listen carefully to your partner and try to be able to comprehend what they are telling you. Always have the courtesy to give your full attention to the conversation when your are talking to each other. It will help you greatly to understand them, when you are looking each other in the eyes when having a conversation. Always reveal through your behavior that you have clearly understood everything said.

2. Never assume you know how your partner feels about anything. Just because you like something don’t volunteer them to do it with you. ASK! Always be so attentive to make sure that they want to do it too.

3. When you see him/her doing something nice, tell them – I got you! Then proceed to thank them for doing such a wonderful thing and tell them how much you appreciate it. You’ll be surprised how far a little appreciation goes. When you make the effort of showing your partner that they make you happy with something, you will be finding that they will repeat doing nice things.

4. Is there something that you both enjoy doing? Then do it at least one time a week together. Go to the cinema, take a course together, go walking, swimming of whatever you like. Find any interests that you can share and do these things often.

5. Don’t be only the partner, be the best friend. When they are working on something they really want, always cheer them on. Be there for them when they need it and provide a shoulder to cry on if necessary. Share dreams and goals and work together. Make sure to let them know how proud you are when the succeed in something.

6. Don’t make the mistake to ignore your partner. Don’t get so wrapped up in your own life that you completely forget the everyday niceties. Kiss and hug them every day. Don’t hang out with your friends the whole weekend or watch TV. Make it a point to do something each weekend with your partner and you will grow closer together and have more in common to talk about.

7. It is very important that you “never go to bed angry”, this might be hard sometimes, but it is vital. If you let your anger boil long enough it will be much harder to resolve the problem and you will be trying to avoid it with leaving the house or going to bed. Learning to agree to disagree if you have to will help in keeping the peace. This will specifically be helpful with smaller problems. You need to make sure though that you really agree to disagree. Don’t waste time being angry about the small things.

8. There is nothing wrong with admitting that you are wrong. If you are wrong, admit it. Your pride will not keep you warm at night and a bad marriage is a high price to pay for it.

Although there will be always individual differences in a relationship, living in harmony is possible. Keep doing the above mentioned things and make sure you have worked out any problem before going to bed.

Love and cherish another. Build up a strong bond by being honest and loving with the other. This is how you make your marriage work.

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Filed under Marriage : Comments (0) : Oct 14th, 2008