Posts Tagged ‘relationship counseling’

Ask Your Mate To Go To A Marriage Counselor

Relationship counseling is often a last resort for couples on the brink of the divorce.But some couples try relationship counseling early, when the first problems arise. Relationship Counseling is something that a couple shouldn’t be afraid to try, even if the problems seem minor.Catching small problems early with counseling can prevent even bigger problems in the future.  Early counseling can even do something to prevent a future divorce.

Todays couples are more apt to try to new things, which makes relationship counseling a good option.Couples married years ago are less likely to go for counseling, perhaps because it wasn’t something you talked about when they were younger. Very often marriages of 20 or 30 years now end in divorce, which is a shame because they’ll never know if relationship counseling could have helped save the marriage.

If you feel like you need relationship counseling, be sure to ask your partner to go to counseling with you in a non-judgmental way.If you ask your partner to go to counseling in a way that seems like you are accusing them of being the problem and needing counseling, you’re likely to encounter resistance to the idea.  Try to make it clear that you want the counseling for yourself if nothing else.

If you ask your partner to go to counseling because you have some issues you need to work on, they’re more likely to view the idea favorably.Explain that you think you need some help to be able to contribute more to the relationship, and to learn how to be a better partner.  Don’t accuse the other person of need counseling.Even if you believe that they are the problem, don’t say it to them.Once you’re both in relationship counseling, you will learn tips and techniques for being better within the relationship, just as your partner will.

Don’t be afraid to suggest marriage counseling, whether you’ve been in the relationship for 6 months, 5 years or 3 decades.  It’s never too late to try counseling to resolve problems.  And it’s never too late to try to keep small problems from becoming big ones. If the relationship is relatively new, you might think that you’re admitting to problems and admitting that the relationship is rocky by suggesting counseling.But that’s not the truth.But by facing any obstacles now, you’re making your relationship stronger in the long run.

If your partner believes that your suggestion of relationship counseling means that the relationship isn’t perfect, and maybe even is doomed, calmly explain that that isn’t true.And because you’re willing to admit that everything is perfect shows that you’re willing to make necessary changes to keep you and your partner happy.

If your partner refuses, go on your own.  While the counseling would work best if both of you go, you can go and work on things to improve yourself. If your partner sees you going to relationship counseling, they’re more likely to give it a try.

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Filed under Divorce : Comments (0) : May 6th, 2009