Posts Tagged ‘family marriage counselor’
How Can Pre Marriage Counseling Help You
Pre marriage counseling really does pay off, according to a four state survey of over 3,000 homes published by Scott Stanley in the Journal of Family Psychology (March, 2006). The survey found that couples who met with marriage family counselors were, on average, 31% less likely to divorce than couples who did not attend counseling. They were also more likely to report higher marital satisfaction, lower marital conflict and greater levels of commitment.
The question of when to seek marriage counseling before the big day may be dicey. It’s sort of like a prenuptial, which some people may find offensive or as admonishing the fact that “Hey things may not work out as planned!” As the practice of counseling for couples becomes more widespread, this becomes less an issue, though. To help guide you, the California Association for Marriage Family Therapists came up with several criterion. If you’re young and have never married, then go! If one partner is “commitment-o-phobic,” then go! If there are unresolved issues regarding money, parenting, household responsibilities, work or sex, then go! If one or more partners have had a previously failed marriage, go! If you feel you’d like added conflict resolution skills, go! Lastly, if there has been a history of childhood or domestic abuse, go! Sometimes these seemingly minor obstacles can become full-blown catastrophes later, so it’s important that they’re addressed early and professionally.
Research shows that money is the #1 thing new couples argue over, which can be addressed through pre marriage counseling. Marriage therapists say the major underlying source of financial conflict is lack of communication. Prior to getting married, you should identify your spending habits. Are you a “big spender” or a “big saver?” Sometimes, there is a communication breakdown as each side tries to win the power struggle. Additionally, there could be “The Done Deal” type who makes financial decisions like opening new credit cards or investing in a rental property without telling his/her spouse until it’s too late. Some people are also vulnerable to “keeping up with the Joneses,” buying out-of-budget cars, boats and gadgets, which drives more practical spouses up the wall. Holidays are another time when communication about spending tends to breakdown. Lastly, forgetting to tell a spouse about past debts can escalate into arguments galore.
Many pre marriage counseling sessions are more like educational courses, rather than therapy. The counselors are there to teach you ways to comfort your crabby partner after he or she has had “the worst day ever.” They’ll show you how to communicate your needs and wants without nagging, complaining or accusing. They’ll teach you how to overcome marriage-killer behavioral patterns like stone-walling, criticizing, defensiveness and contemptuousness. Before you say “I Do,” you can learn your personal conflict styles and recognize the relationship’s strengths and possible weaknesses, which will create better understanding in the long run.
Tags: christian marriage counseling, counseling for couples, family marriage counselor, licensed professional counselors, pre marriage counseling
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May 6th, 2009
Making Use Of Family Counselors During Tough Times
licensed professional counselors
In the early 20th Century, psychologist Carl Jung posited that children will begin to live out the unconscious conflicts of their parents. When parents are locked into a dysfunctional relationship, children will begin acting out in school, feeling depressed or rebelling against their parents out of spite. Family counselors began to emerge to treat these problems stemming from a damaged family system.
In general, a family counselor is skilled in an area of psychotherapy that helps parents and children interact, communicate, resolve conflicts, deal with emotions, understand one another better and forgive. Family therapy from licensed counselors can benefit families with marital problems, divorce, eating disorders, depression, substance abuse, work-related stress, credit problems, violence, parenting disagreements, grief or chronic health problems. Typically, families will attend weekly one-hour sessions with a family marriage counselor for a period of three to five months. However, if physical abuse, substance abuse or divorce is a factor, then the duration may be extended.
Family counselors have one goal and one goal only, and that is to bring family members closer together. Throughout several consecutive sessions, a family marriage counselor will examine each member’s problem solving skills, emotional capacity, role within the family, behavioral patterns and communication styles to see how each person may be helping or hindering the dysfunctional family unit. By understanding each other’s motivations, strengths and weaknesses, family members can learn to diffuse anger and form more peaceful, meaningful relationships.
Family counselors focus on relationship building more than diagnosing individual disorders or illnesses. If one of the family members is a substance abuser or physical abuser, then he or she may be sent to abuse counselors as well. Or, if the couples are feuding bitterly following a separation, then they may require divorce assistance on top of group family therapy. Sitting down together to resolve differences may not solve everything, but it is certainly a positive step toward ending destructive patterns that threaten to weaken your familial bonds.
Tags: family counselors, family marriage counselor, licensed counselors, licensed professional counselors, marriage family counselors
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May 6th, 2009
Family Marriage Counseling Has Demonstrated Profound Areas Of Effectiveness
Research indicates that family marriage counseling is particularly effective in treating adult Schizophrenia, mood disorders, adult alcoholism and drug abuse, behavioral disorders in children, teenage drug abuse, anorexia, childhood autism, chronic illnesses and marital conflict. Sometimes the root cause or cycle of dysfunction is obvious, but other times it takes a professional to illuminate the intricate dynamics of cause-and-effect, action-and-reaction. Through family and marriage therapy, family members learn how to better understand one another and cope with complex issues to become a stronger, more cohesive unit.
A professional who is licensed in marriage and family counseling is someone who is trained in psychotherapy and family systems, as well as someone who is licensed to diagnose and treat mental disorders. On average, family and marriage therapists will have thirteen years or more of clinical practice in their field and hold a Master’s or Doctoral degree in marriage therapy and family counseling. Since 1970, the number of marriage family counselors has burgeoned from 237 to 23,000, who are licensed in 48 states and are actively treating more than 1.8 million people.
Studies show that clients of family marriage counseling are extremely satisfied with these services, with 98% citing their sessions as either “good” or “excellent” (Doherty & Simmons). They report improvement in work productivity, coworker relationships, family relationships, spousal relationships, as well as improved community social lives. Almost 90% of those receiving treatment reported an improvement in emotional health and two-thirds reported an improvement in their overall physical health. In cases of child deviance, 73.7% of the cases resulted in improvement in parent-child relationships, improved child behavior and improved school performance. In cases of physical or mental illness, substance abuse and disruptive behavior, certified counselors can be a huge asset.
Kids and teens often act out in strange ways; taking drugs, falling sullen, expressing anxiety, eating too much or too little, engaging in premature sexual activity, acting out in school or acting disobediently towards their parents. Often, their parent’s reaction to this sort of behavior can exacerbate the situation, even though most parents just want what is best for their child. According to the Journal of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, family marriage counseling has demonstrated profound effectiveness in the areas of conduct disorders, substance abuse, depression, anxiety, eating disorders and understanding attention problems.
Tags: certified counselors, family marriage counseling, family marriage counselor, marriage therapists, marriage therapy
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Apr 19th, 2009